I’ve been asked in the past about shooting boudoir with your partner. From how to help them feel comfortable, to how to shoot more often. So, in this post I thought I would go over some tips that you might find helpful. Topics I will cover today include:
Respect their Boundaries
Ease into It
Clear their Plate
Make it Special
Show your Best (and Theirs)
Stay Cool
Keep it Fun
Respect their Boundaries
Rule number one when shooting boudoir with your partner is… Respect their boundaries. Just because you are comfortable with the thought of shooting boudoir, doesn’t mean they are too. It can be intimidating to don lingerie for the camera or to be the one behind the camera trying to take good pictures. Don’t downplay their feelings. Ask them if they have any specific concerns you can address that would help them feel more comfortable with shooting boudoir together. Honest communication is as important here as anywhere else in your relationship.
Easy into It
If you are completely new to photography don’t start with boudoir. Take some time to get your basic photography skills down first. Begin with less intimidating genres of photography. My suggestion would be to start with portrait photography. If you can take a great portrait your partner loves they might feel more comfortable with shooting boudoir.
Clear their Plate
One of the roadblocks to shooting photos with your partner is simply finding the time to do it. This goes for all genres of photography, not just boudoir. If your partner is really busy and has a lot on their plate, take the time to help clear that plate. If you have kids, get a babysitter for the day or even for the night and get a hotel together. You can also send your partner out of the house for a while and take care of all the household chores that usually stress them out.
Make it Special
A great time to have a boudoir shoot as a couple is during a special event. My wife and I have done boudoir shoots on trips and for many of our wedding anniversaries. In fact, our first boudoir shoot was on our sixth wedding anniversary in Mexico. Or perhaps you want to have a date night where you spend time with each other. Go out to dinner, go on a hike, or any activity you both enjoy. Simply being in each other's company for a while can lighten the mood and pave the way to a fun photo session.
Show your Best (and Theirs)
When you do get to shoot for the first time, show your partner a good photo right off the bat. It helps if you have thought this through beforehand and planned ahead. My suggestion here is to do a little research on poses that will work for your situation, be aware of any areas they feel particularly self-conscious about and play up the features they are most confident about. If you share a good photo of them, they will be more likely to relax and enjoy the session. If your partner is the one behind the camera, ask to look at the photos and let them know how much you like the pictures they have taken so far.
Stay Cool
During the shoot if something isn’t working the way you expected, try not to get frustrated. Your partner might think you are getting frustrated with them, even if that isn’t the case. If a pose isn’t working out, just move on to the next one like nothing is wrong. You can always try it another time after you think about it some more and remember not all poses will be appropriate for every individual.
Keep it Fun
By keeping photo sessions a fun, no-pressure, activity you experience together, both of you can look forward to it rather than having the potential of one partner dreading it. If you want to continue doing boudoir shoots with your partner, it’s in both your best interests to keep it as light-hearted as possible. Playing music you both enjoy and flirting are good ways to help with that.
Final Thoughts
If you want this to be a good experience for the both of you keep these tips in mind. Above all else, always remember rule number one when you are shooting boudoir with your partner. Respect their boundaries.
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